The End of the World-- For Real This Time

So, if you didn’t know, you all died a week ago. I know, barely different from being alive, right?

            If you are like me, you knew the world wasn’t really going to end, but at least thought it would be a good party theme. Or, if you’re my mom, a good reason to drink.

            The prediction, made by Family Radio owner, horrible mathematician and Hugh Hefner impersonator, Harold Camping, stated that at 6 p.m. on May 21^st, the world would be thrown into earthquakes that would open the graves of the dead. Not to mention, Evil Jesus would come back down to Earth to judge people. This isn’t like judge a beer pong competition or white t-shirt competition. This is whether you should go to heaven or hell, kind of an important topic. And the sad part is that people were actually seriously depressed, needing counseling because May 22^nd arrived.

            The world ending brought some cheerful thoughts from my recent college grad friends—no paying off giant loans, no more headaches searching for a job. But, again, they weren’t taking this serious.           

            If you remember, the world has another expiration date—December 21, 2012, determined by the Mayan calendar, who truthfully probably just got tired of counting. Wouldn’t you? I mean, that they even got all the way to 2012 is impressive.

            Now, here is my point, besides that people are crazy. The world is going to end one day. This is true. But you can’t go on living like it is going to end today. Predicting the end of the world isn’t something people should be wasting their time on. Live each and every day like it is important, no matter what. That doesn’t mean you have to go out and spend ridiculous amounts of money or go on vacation with your family because you know you won’t have to pay the bill since there is no future. What is your excuse? To quote one of my favorite musicals, Rent, no day but today.

I'll Lie And Say I'm a Hoarder

Now that graduation is over, there is something harder to face. No, I am not talking about searching for a job, even though that is pretty hard. I am referring to cleaning your room.

            Once upon a time, your room fit your personality. And that time was in high school. And sure, you have occasionally cleaned up over the summer. But the fact is that your room has barely changed since senior year of high school and now you are trying to move in all your dorm room stuff into a high school student’s room.

            I have already made a trip to Goodwill with all the stuff that needs to go (mostly shirts, as my roommates know, I have a ton of shirts) and I need to schedule another one. Not to mention it has almost been a week since I graduated and my room is still a mess.

            I am ready to call Hoarders Buried Alive, Extreme Homemaker or What Not to Wear for someone else to clean out my mess of a closet. Or at least have Romeo pick out all the things he doesn’t eat, I can keep.

            The hardest thing is the real message behind unpacking and that is growing up. All those things you kept as a child/ teenager don’t hold the same importance anymore. It is a sad thing, but again a happy thing. You are growing up, already sneaking peaks of furniture at Pottery Barn or, my favorite, Target.

Then there is the thought that how much stuff could possibly fit in my bedroom? I believe closets are like Mary Poppins’ bag—bottomless.

My advice to all those people in the same situation is to keep plugging away. At some point, your room will look the way you want it. Then you will probably move out and have to start it all over again. Or, if you’re like me, and your little brother is graduating in two weeks and the party is at your house, you better listen to your mom when she says it NEEDS to be done by then.

Class of 2011ers

I am graduating tomorrow. Yes, as in 24 hours from now. However, I am not the only one in my family who is part of the class of 2011. My youngest brother, Kevin, is graduating in two weeks. Here is some advice I have for Kevin and the other class of 2011ers going in to college.

• Forget high school, college is the best four years of your life
• Yes, you get to sleep in until your first class, which may not even be until 2 pm
• Don’t worry about not having any friends at first because everyone is very friendly the first couple of days because they are in the same situation
• You probably won’t get along with your first roommate. It’s okay. It is hard to get along with someone while you are both undergoing a new experience
• Your dorm will be the size of a closet freshman year, no matter where you go. It will get bigger each year.
• Learn how to do laundry before you go off to school
• Fine Arts classes does not guarantee it will be fun
• Ditto creative writing
• Try to get a job during your freshman year. It helps you make new friends and the extra money doesn’t hurt
• If you do get a job, do not over-work yourself. There’s a reason most jobs in college only allow you to work 20 hours a week.
• The library is the only place you will find silence and, even then, it is a 50/50 chance.
• Try to participate in every opportunity that comes your way. No regrets.
• If you insist on drinking, always bring a buddy.
• Wear flip flops in the shower. You will figure out why.
• Just because the university/ college hands out a list of what to bring to your first dorm room doesn’t mean you bring it all.
• Take pictures of everything
• Make sure you have fun because you’ll be paying off this four year bill for a very long time.
• Going to class ups your grade. Not lying. So don’t skip immense amount of classes.
• You get out of college what you put in. If you don’t read or never go to class, you’re never going to learn anything. And, let’s face it, you are paying a lot for school so you might as well learn something.
• The syllabus should come with a disclaimer that says “will only partially stick to this schedule.”
• Pay attention to the building names or you’ll be dreadfully lost.
• People can tell you’re a freshman when you wear your lanyard containing your keys and ID around your neck.
• Start a quote book.

And my super, awesome, spectacular advice that no one will ever give you is…

Don’t get a dog the summer before your senior year, expect your parents to take care of it, and then insist that you aren’t going to miss the crap out of him/her when your gone.

And most of all, good luck and have fun.

Happy Birthday

In honor of my newest blog, http://gensisincstory.blogspot.com/, there will not be a posting this week. Instead, go over to http://gensisincstory.blogspot.com/ and read some fabulous fiction about reincarnation. How Long Have You Been Working On That Novel will return next week with a special graduation post. Until then, enjoy two chapters of fiction.

--Amanda

The End is Near

It is nearing the end of the school year and the “World’s Coming to an End” syndrome is going around. There are many ways which people deal with the end nearing. Here are just a few:

The Its 5 o’clock Somewhere Crowd—the people who have totally given up on going to class or doing any work. Most of their days are spent tanning in this lovely weather, drinking beer, hosting barbeques and playing golf. All I have to say, it must be nice to be these kind of people without a care in the world. But you will be screwed when it comes down to the final days of finals.

The Library Group—Yes, I noticed all of you spending hours in the library, hoping it would help. They carry around oversized backpacks with all this year’s books and their laptops. Then, when they finally make it to the library, they on Facebook, AIM and Twitter to announce to the world they are here to work and, subsequently, get stuck in conversations and get little to no work done. My advice would be to leave the technology at home and write out the paper by hand (archaic, I know). At the very least, don’t connect to the internet and I guarantee you’ll get more done.

The Doom Sayers—The people who crowd Academic Services and the Writing Center, because, most likely, they slacked off the majority of the semester and are all now Chicken Littles, proclaiming the sky is falling. Relax. If you look at the amount of work you have as a whole, you will never get anything done. If you tackle thing one by one, then you will be fine.

The Sentimentalists—This usually applies to only seniors or people transferring. They try to capture everything with a sigh, stating over-sugary sweet proclamations like, “This is our last trip to Keene.” When you know, a few months ago, they were saying, “Keene sucks I can’t wait to get out of here.” To these people, take a picture, it lasts longer.

The G-Word Bombers—Also applies to seniors. Those few jittery people who either become depressed when you mention graduation or freak out. To these people, get over it! Seriously. Everything happens for a reason. There is a reason for this new chapter in your lives.

When I Grow Up...

            Isn’t it funny when you look back on old school assignments and see what you wanted to be when you grew up? I know, personally, my aspirations included being an elephant, a Spice Girl, a teacher and a writer. Some of these goals lose their thunder after a while, especially when you discover that, as a human, there is no physical way you can grow up to be an elephant. Others stick with us, like, for me, being a writer.

            This is a topic I have been thinking about a lot lately with graduation, gulp, three weeks and counting. I wonder how I went from elephant to Spice Girl to teacher to writer to editor. I tell everyone that I want to be an editor because I used to love correcting my mom’s tests, but after seeing the hostile environment that comes along with teaching, I could never do it.

            Then, there are always those people who laughed at your dreams. I am guilty of this whole-heartedly. When my little brother told me he one day wanted to be a fry cook like Spongebob, I told him he needed to get his butt to culinary school. Well, karma struck back on that one, because guess what I do three nights a week for $7 an hour? You guessed it. I’m a fry cook.

            You have to wonder though, do recessions take away our “when I grow up” dreams? Does money and power standing intervene on achieving our dreams? Do you really think the CEO of ExxonMobil or one of those lovely Wall Street stockbrokers dreamed of being just that when they were kids? I’ll tell you a secret. I don’t think they did.

Kindle Killers

I have noticed something the last few weeks of school. When you mention a Kindle to an English major, he or she glares at you like you were the one to shoot Bambi’s mother. Not even kidding. So I decided to dedicate this week’s blog to:

Why This English Major Decided to Get A Kindle

1. Free books— The day I got my Kindle, I downloaded 22 books for $1.95. Why is that? Twenty of them were free. Yes, isn’t that wonderful? Most of the classics are either free or relatively cheap, which will definitely help when you have that B.A. in English and living near poverty level.

2. Multiple books—I pretty much accepted early on in life that I was going to have back problems like my mom because of all the books I carry around. During school, I am usually reading at least three novels at once, more out of necessity than need. I’ll go to work with one novel then really wish I brought one of the other ones instead. With the Kindle, I can carry around a hundred books and not break my back.

3. Borders closing—Along with Uno’s and Blockbuster, Borders has joined among the ranks of things I love and died during the recession. The one near my house is closing, thus making the next closest one in a different state. And I refuse to go to the Barnes and Noble. Now, I can download books without getting shipping charges from Amazon.

4. I hate small print—Yes, I will admit. You all feel the same way. When you read a novel and there is small print, it becomes associated with difficulty, or at least it comes across as really condensed. I like my font the same size as Times New Roman size 12 font at least. It makes it easier to read and thus more enjoyable.

The Kindle is not a death to books, but just makes books more accessible. I promise, owning one won’t kill books, maybe just kill less trees.