Self Censorship

            The connotation associated with censorship is that it is a bad thing. Opinions also vary on the idea of censorship—some people are for it and others are not. There is one form of censorship that seems to work well with life and that is self censoring our thoughts. We don’t say everything we think in order to spare the feelings of others, to abstain from hurting our own feelings or just to be polite. However, at certain ages, we lose our censors at the expense of others.

            I will tell you a story. I have just recently started a job as a waitress to the place I have worked the past 2 summers. I pretty much knew the clientele was of the retired age and older. Sometimes these people are very courteous and other times they love to complain, especially on rainy days. As I was trying to be as nice as possible for a good tip, this couple just blurted out, “The food was better last year.” They said it so nonchalantly, like, “How’s the weather outside?” or “Can I have another drink?” that I was taken aback. I was wondering if they even noticed their bluntness. They seemed fine with what they said, like nothing was wrong with it. I could tell there was not a single ounce of remorse for what they said, thus no censor.

            The same can be said of children. If you ever spend time with small children under the age of 7, they don’t keep their mouths shut. There is screaming, yelling and pointing out the blatantly obvious. There is no censor for a child, but as the child grows older, he or she realizes that saying what is in his or her head isn’t right.

            Here comes the question of the week. Is it right? Should we suppress our true feelings in order to be polite? Or should we be wise like the elderly or pure like children and just say what we think?

Don't Mess With a Lady's Luggage

 I hate stereotypes. The only place they belong is in literature for secondary characters. If you don’t know what that means, google it. But, ladies, there is one certain stereotype that we must accept is true—luggage.

            The stereotype is that women always pack heavily when going on vacation.

            Now, before every trip, we make this promise to ourselves to pack lightly, especially if the trip is short. But then we start to pack a tiny bag or suit case and keep thinking, but I will need the second sundress if the weather is nice or one pair of shoes just isn’t enough. Next thing you know, there is a giant suitcase filled with half your wardrobe, including winter clothes even though it is summer.

            This process may be flawed, but it seems to work. In the beginning, there is a small bag to start. And sometimes the small bag is all you need. If you need a bigger bag, don’t hesitate. Usually I find, if you think you need to pack something and you don’t, you usually end up needing it at some point during your trip.

            It is just a fact of life that women pack a lot. The stereotype is that not all women pack a lot. But over-packing isn’t always a bad thing. You know if you go with a man and his one duffle bag, he always forgets everything. So, technically you are packing for two.

It is a tradition that women pack heavily. And you don’t mess with tradition.

The Domino that Turned into a Snowball

Our lives are filled with decisions. Each decision alters our lives in some way. If it is going left on the fork in the road instead of right, going to the bank today instead of tomorrow, stopping to fill up the tank later instead of now, fate has been altered. And so has the fate of others.

            Many people do not comprehend how their choices affect another person. Whether it’s an ex-boyfriends sending his ex-girlfriend a present to clear his conscience even though she’s over the relationship, a person who everyone had faith in that his or her life will change and he or she goes back to his or her past habits, a girl who cheated on her fiancée but still hasn’t told him, the decision has an impact on another’s life. It’s a domino effect that snowballs out of control. Every action has a reaction and that reaction always affects more than one person.

            For a wide known example, I will pick on Representative Anthony Weiner and, well, his wiener. If you have been living not only under a rock but 60 feet underground as well, the man cheated on his pregnant wife with Facebook and Twitter cyber-sex. This seems like something that would only affect Representative Weiner and his wife, but it does not.

            What about the women he cheated with? Won’t they be embarrassed that their intimate conversations are now published on the web and print media?

            What about the Weiners’ future child? How will he or she feel about his/her father not being around over a few lewd pictures?

            What about the people who supported Weiner? Do they feel like idiots for supporting a dishonorable man? Or are they even surprised?

            What about the journalist who had to skip his or her child’s concert or football game in order to cover this breaking news.

            What the Facebook and Twitter users? Will the standards on this websites be changed so that a scandal like this couldn’t happen again? Changes of the rules of Facebook and Twitter would affect everyone who uses the social networks.

            One decision from one man sparked a slew of reactions from multiple people. It only takes one domino pushed to make them all fall down. Then the effect keeps growing hitting multiple people as it spirals downhill and out of control. So next time you are about to make a decision, stop and think—who’s life am I about to alter?

Another Year Older, Another Year Older....

When you are eight, you count down the days to them. When you are twenty, you can’t wait till them. When you are thirty-nine, you celebrate the same one three or four times. That’s right, I am talking about birthdays. The day that everyone gathers around to celebrate the moment you came out of your mother and remind you how many years ago that was.

            Last year, for obvious reasons, I was ecstatic for my birthday to come along. Mostly because most of my friends had already hit the big 21 and I was still annoyingly 20. As of recently though, birthdays aren’t as fun as they used to be. It seems, as we get older, birthdays just become reminders of one step closer to death.

            If you haven’t caught on, I feel old at the age of 22. But why should I? With my genes, that probably isn’t even a quarter of my lifetime. It is not like I have a shorten life in front of me. I am just starting; after all, college just ended three weeks ago.

            I can trace the insecurities about age though. Society sets standards for certain ages. At ten, we should get more responsibilities. At thirteen, we should be in the middle of puberty. At sixteen, we need to have a license. At eighteen, we are adults. At twenty one, we should start drinking. By forty, we should be married with children. By sixty five, we should retire. Every age is planned for us, deciphered for us about what stage of life we should be in.

            But I say we should take on the stages we are prepared for, even if this deems us as immature or too mature. If everyone is unique, then every age is unique. No one can tell you that you are old. Only you can deem that yourself. You can be a young 85 or an old 25. It all depends on you.

The End of the World-- For Real This Time

So, if you didn’t know, you all died a week ago. I know, barely different from being alive, right?

            If you are like me, you knew the world wasn’t really going to end, but at least thought it would be a good party theme. Or, if you’re my mom, a good reason to drink.

            The prediction, made by Family Radio owner, horrible mathematician and Hugh Hefner impersonator, Harold Camping, stated that at 6 p.m. on May 21^st, the world would be thrown into earthquakes that would open the graves of the dead. Not to mention, Evil Jesus would come back down to Earth to judge people. This isn’t like judge a beer pong competition or white t-shirt competition. This is whether you should go to heaven or hell, kind of an important topic. And the sad part is that people were actually seriously depressed, needing counseling because May 22^nd arrived.

            The world ending brought some cheerful thoughts from my recent college grad friends—no paying off giant loans, no more headaches searching for a job. But, again, they weren’t taking this serious.           

            If you remember, the world has another expiration date—December 21, 2012, determined by the Mayan calendar, who truthfully probably just got tired of counting. Wouldn’t you? I mean, that they even got all the way to 2012 is impressive.

            Now, here is my point, besides that people are crazy. The world is going to end one day. This is true. But you can’t go on living like it is going to end today. Predicting the end of the world isn’t something people should be wasting their time on. Live each and every day like it is important, no matter what. That doesn’t mean you have to go out and spend ridiculous amounts of money or go on vacation with your family because you know you won’t have to pay the bill since there is no future. What is your excuse? To quote one of my favorite musicals, Rent, no day but today.

I'll Lie And Say I'm a Hoarder

Now that graduation is over, there is something harder to face. No, I am not talking about searching for a job, even though that is pretty hard. I am referring to cleaning your room.

            Once upon a time, your room fit your personality. And that time was in high school. And sure, you have occasionally cleaned up over the summer. But the fact is that your room has barely changed since senior year of high school and now you are trying to move in all your dorm room stuff into a high school student’s room.

            I have already made a trip to Goodwill with all the stuff that needs to go (mostly shirts, as my roommates know, I have a ton of shirts) and I need to schedule another one. Not to mention it has almost been a week since I graduated and my room is still a mess.

            I am ready to call Hoarders Buried Alive, Extreme Homemaker or What Not to Wear for someone else to clean out my mess of a closet. Or at least have Romeo pick out all the things he doesn’t eat, I can keep.

            The hardest thing is the real message behind unpacking and that is growing up. All those things you kept as a child/ teenager don’t hold the same importance anymore. It is a sad thing, but again a happy thing. You are growing up, already sneaking peaks of furniture at Pottery Barn or, my favorite, Target.

Then there is the thought that how much stuff could possibly fit in my bedroom? I believe closets are like Mary Poppins’ bag—bottomless.

My advice to all those people in the same situation is to keep plugging away. At some point, your room will look the way you want it. Then you will probably move out and have to start it all over again. Or, if you’re like me, and your little brother is graduating in two weeks and the party is at your house, you better listen to your mom when she says it NEEDS to be done by then.

Class of 2011ers

I am graduating tomorrow. Yes, as in 24 hours from now. However, I am not the only one in my family who is part of the class of 2011. My youngest brother, Kevin, is graduating in two weeks. Here is some advice I have for Kevin and the other class of 2011ers going in to college.

• Forget high school, college is the best four years of your life
• Yes, you get to sleep in until your first class, which may not even be until 2 pm
• Don’t worry about not having any friends at first because everyone is very friendly the first couple of days because they are in the same situation
• You probably won’t get along with your first roommate. It’s okay. It is hard to get along with someone while you are both undergoing a new experience
• Your dorm will be the size of a closet freshman year, no matter where you go. It will get bigger each year.
• Learn how to do laundry before you go off to school
• Fine Arts classes does not guarantee it will be fun
• Ditto creative writing
• Try to get a job during your freshman year. It helps you make new friends and the extra money doesn’t hurt
• If you do get a job, do not over-work yourself. There’s a reason most jobs in college only allow you to work 20 hours a week.
• The library is the only place you will find silence and, even then, it is a 50/50 chance.
• Try to participate in every opportunity that comes your way. No regrets.
• If you insist on drinking, always bring a buddy.
• Wear flip flops in the shower. You will figure out why.
• Just because the university/ college hands out a list of what to bring to your first dorm room doesn’t mean you bring it all.
• Take pictures of everything
• Make sure you have fun because you’ll be paying off this four year bill for a very long time.
• Going to class ups your grade. Not lying. So don’t skip immense amount of classes.
• You get out of college what you put in. If you don’t read or never go to class, you’re never going to learn anything. And, let’s face it, you are paying a lot for school so you might as well learn something.
• The syllabus should come with a disclaimer that says “will only partially stick to this schedule.”
• Pay attention to the building names or you’ll be dreadfully lost.
• People can tell you’re a freshman when you wear your lanyard containing your keys and ID around your neck.
• Start a quote book.

And my super, awesome, spectacular advice that no one will ever give you is…

Don’t get a dog the summer before your senior year, expect your parents to take care of it, and then insist that you aren’t going to miss the crap out of him/her when your gone.

And most of all, good luck and have fun.